When you don’t quit
I’ve been up since 4 AM researching a new project I’ll be launching in January. I am feeling so, so excited.
Since I’ve started putting myself out there on this blog, my brain is opening up to other ideas of fun and scary things I could do.
Writing here daily is also helping me build a relationship with myself where I know that I will continue to show up for myself, no matter what.
I used to follow a formula where I would get really fascinated with something, do lots and lots of work on it and then right before the scary part, I would quit.
Quitting always felt necessary and important. Looking back on it, I can see I wasn’t willing to feel any negative emotions.
Here are a few aborted projects that come to mind:
I wanted to run an online vintage clothing shop on Etsy. I had inventory, I hired a woman to model the clothes… and then I thought the pictures sucked, so I quit.
I joined a burlesque class and stopped going just a few classes away from the performance. The thought of inviting people to see me dance terrified me. The thought of not having anyone in the audience for me was also devastating. The same happened with an improv comedy class I took.
I don’t regret having made these choices because I can see now how important it is to not bail on myself.
When you bail on yourself, you damage your most important relationship – the one you have with yourself.