I’m walking the dog before daylight and I’m thinking about my client who says she’s afraid to look at the thoughts in her mind.
She’s afraid that if she starts doing thought work she’ll go to this deep, dark place she can never return from.
I wonder what it’s like to live in fear of your own brain.
Lonely, I think, it would be lonely.
But doesn’t seem right for her.
At that moment my dog tugs me forward and my headlamp illuminates two glowing eyes just across the street, staring at us. I can’t see the animal’s body, but I do know that it’s coming closer, closer.
I feel panic raging in my stomach, boiling into my chest and throat. My heart races. I’m holding my breath. Every time the animal blinks it is invisible for a moment and the thought of not knowing its true location fuels more panic. I don’t know if it’s a cougar or a kitty cat, or something even worse. I hurry us home before I find out.
Oh. It’s like that for her.
She doesn’t know if her thoughts are cougars or kitty cats and she’s afraid to find out.
It makes sense to me now why she’s backing away. She fears for her own life and she thinks running will save her.
What she doesn’t see is that by not going there she’s already living in that deep, dark place.
She’s living that fear and she’s alive in it. She hasn’t died. The worst is already happening and all she has to do now is look around.
If I could tell her anything it would be this –
Bravery is the way through, sister.
You have the strength to face the things you fear.
The reason you are afraid is because of the thoughts in your mind.
Your thoughts are creating the fear you are living in.
You just have to be willing to go forward and take a look.