One of our clients wrote in with the most brilliant thing the other day.
She created what she called an “Acceptance Model.”
This is a self-coaching model where you just spell out reality and embrace it instead of arguing against.
Here’s mine for today:
C: Josh left at TIME/DATE and will return on TIME/DATE
T: Josh is not currently here and that’s OK.
A: Send him text messages, carry on with day (walk dog, buy groceries, tidy house), notice his absence, but don’t buffer or wish that he wasn’t gone
R: I allow myself to accept the current reality instead of arguing against it. I stay present even though he is absent and don’t create unnecessary suffering.
This is something I can return to again and again over the next week while Josh is gone. I can remind myself of this when I’m bored or lonely or just wish he was here to talk to. He is not currently here and that’s OK.
Although we often work to accept reality in our coaching sessions, there’s something about giving it a named home that really solidifies it for me.